SURREAL OR WHAT! YES, THIS CONVERSATION DID HAPPEN

This is a conversation I had this evening in the supermarket by the refrigerated pizzas and special offers counter.

me: Hello, how is everyone and how's your mum?
her: She died...
me: Oh, I'm so sorry.
her: It's alright, she died six years ago.
me: Oh.
her: Mum and dad are both in the local cemetery now.
me: um, were they from here?
her: no.  

Then I was told where the respective parents were from and where she herself grew up.

her:  The dog died as well.  It was a choice as to whether mum should be buried in the garden and the dog with dad.  But then dad bought and paid for a double lair and would have been upset if mum had not used it.
 
me: (nodding my head), of course.

her: But then, dad liked the dog and they went out a lot together, so perhaps he would not have minded too much.

me: Hm, I see.

her: The funeral directors said they could arrange to bury mum in the garden, but we thought perhaps not.  So, we have mum and dad in the cemetery together and the dog is buried in the garden.


 

TRAVELS AND ARGUMENTS WITH A GPS

I'm not doing that.
No, we're not going that way.
It led me the quickest but most difficult road.
Exit;
Keep Right;
keep right;
keep left;
exit at 300 yards;
keep left;
follow road left;
Silence...no instructions when expected
Signal's gone....now what?
We know where we want to go, follow the road signs and keep going round to the left.
Ah, the signal has reappeared.

Exit;
No it wants to take me somewhere else...it does not, it is just telling you there is an exit, it would give additional instructions if you had to make a manoeuvre.
Oh, we're on the bridge, bet it gives wrong instruction for turn off.....let's see.

Drive ahead........exit.
It hasn't told you to exit, we know we don't want this one.

Exit at 350 yards, take exit.
We did